We're dying to be safe

Goodbyes are hard but there can also be great joy...for example, it is so exciting for me to watch as a close-knit group of friends has challenged, encouraged, grown, and loved one another this semester and is now being "sent out" to the far corners of the world. For a time we have built one another up in the Lord, we have grown together and loved together. We have "sharpened" one another. We have shared God's heart and His vision for the world--the borders beyond--and now He's sending us out. There are many uncertainties: Who will return and when? What is God going to show us? How is He going to lead? What wonders will we witness? What atrocities?

We long to see the heart of God. We offer up our lives in simple obedience. Father, give us more!! We live for revival. We seek to dance the Kingdom down.

The road is dangerous and hard. I am learning that faith is trusting in God's faithfulness (things unseen) and this produces hope (faith in future grace; for the joy set before...). Without faith; without hope--it is impossible to please God.

He has called us out. Jesus demands action. There is too much sitting still. So we go.

Yesterday was our last sunday together. We've grown to be like-minded and single-passioned by the Spirit's work through Pastor Peter. It's been incredible and so encouraging. He prayed with us after the service. As we stood there, hands joined and hearts knit, I felt the Spirit's presence and sensed a bit of the wonder and awe that must have been present at some of the early church gatherings. What joy. The Lord sends us off; we send each other off.
Pastor Peter prayed for us--just what we've all been thinking and feeling--"God, we ask not for protection (that just doesn't seem right). You did not say we would be safe and so I ask you to send these young people to the dark, dangerous corners of the world to be a light of your love and to bring the kingdom down. Stretch the borders of the church to the dark corners of the world." I've been talking a lot about "safety" and the call of Christ with Zach. It's been really good. We're learning a lot about the soveriegnty of God. The other night Mariah, Melissa, and I had a great conversation about what it means to leave the comfort behind--to deny oneself of the empty "American dream" and to dream a new dream...The reality we all feel and love is this: we don't want the "white picket fence" dream. We don't want the comfortable, safe career. There is a work to be done and we're dying to do it. Heartsickness is what I've prayed for this semester. I asked God to make my heart hurt like Nehemiah's did for the condition of Israels and Jerusalem's ruin. He's growing this sickness in me. He's giving me a burden for lost, sick, hurting, dirty, broken people and it is growing into a passion that I can't explain. I feel like I'm on the edge of something. I am eager to see how He will use me and what He will teach me. Lead on! I follow not with fear!

We dropped Mariah off at the airport later in the evening yesterday. Melissa, Sarah, Erin and I all went to the airport to see her off. It was a tearful goodbye. It was full od wonder, I could feel it--wonder at what God is going to do--but it was a little painful becuase our hearts have been knit. I won't see Mariah for six months. The reality started to hit. I won't see Zach for six months. I won't see Melissa for a year. We're all going overseas. Other dear friends say behind at Moody--praying and working for revival. Lord, we ask for revival!!
My peace lies in Christ's kingdom work. My hope is in His faithfulness...and I eagerly anticipate word of how God will use each life for His glory. Our lives our not our own! As Jim Elliot said, my blood has no worth but to be poured out before His throne.

I seek a spirit of surrender and obedience. Disobedience dulls our ears to his voice. Tune my ears, Father! Teach me to obey and help my unbelief!!
Following Jesus is not safe no matter where it leads me. Jesus' voice will always lead us out of self. I'm reading The New Friars right now (incredible book by Scott Bessenecker) and he writes in it that seeking and building the kingdom of God "leads you out of the cocoons of familiarity." In other words, it leads you OUT OF comfort OUT OF ease OUT OF safety. He also challenges followers to "give the dark places of the world no rest." That's what we've been talking about!! Give evil no rest. Light the candles he gives you to light! It might be something "small"--do it! Ask the Spirit to lead, and seek to obey!

I can't believe I leave for Africa in about three weeks. What wonders lie ahead? I am eager to learn more about the heart of my Savior and to see more of God.

We seek safety because we fear death...? Actually, we are dying in order to be safe. We are existing until eternity while the world goes to hell. Who is Jesus? What did he say?

Are we LIVING?