Hmmm

I read this on the 18th from Morning and Evening, by Charles Spurgeon, and have been thinking of it ever since. I've gone back to read it twice and several times I have been reminded of it during the day. It's very interesting to me that it has made me think so much. Not that it shouldn't, but it is something I haven't really been thinking about but all of a sudden I was presented with these thoughts and now they are on my mind a lot. It was a convicting piece to read. Convicting for myself personally and also on a broader level as a member of the Global Church. It isn't only something I need to challenge myself with, but something I need to challenge others with--and sometimes that's the most difficult of the two.

So here's what I read...
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Strangers are come into the santuaries of the Lord's house." Jeremiah 51:51

On this account the faces of the Lord's people were covered with shame, for it was a terrible thing that men should intrude into the Holy Place reserved for the priests alone. Everywhere about us we see like cause for sorrow. How many ungodly men are now educating with the view of entering into the ministry! What a crying sin is that solemn lie by which our whole population is nominally comprehended in a National Church! How fearful it is that ordinances should be pressed upon the unconverted, and that among the more enlightened churches of our land there should be such laxity of discipline. If the thousands who will read this portion shall all take this matter before the Lord Jesus this day, He will interfere and avert the evil which else will come upon His Church. To adulterate the Church is to pollute a well, to pour water upon fire, to sow a fertile field with stones. May we all have grace to maintain in our proper way the purity of the Church, as being an assembly of believers, and not a nation, an unsaved community of unconverted men.
Our zeal must, however, begin at home. Let us examine ourselves as to our right to eat at the Lord's table. Let us see to it that we have on our wedding garment, lest we ourselves be intruders in the Lord's sanctuaries. Many are called, but few are chosen; the way is narrow, and the gate is strait. O for grace to come to Jesus aright, with the faith of God's elect. He who smote Uzzah for touching the ark is very jealous of His two ordinances; as a true believer I may approach them freely, as an alien I must not touch them lest I die. Heart searching is the duty of all who are baptized or come to the Lord's table. 'Search me, O God, and know my way, try me and know my heart.'
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The whole passage really impresses me. I often forget that the Lord indeed smote Uzzah for touching the ark. I forget that He is a jealous God--jealous for my love and for my whole heart...Jealous for HIS glory. Hmmm. "Our zeal must begin at home"...I like that. "Heart searching is the DUTY of all who are baptized or come to the Lord's table." Oh, how I forget this! "Search me, O God!"

"Let us examine ourselves as to our right to eat at the Lord's table..."

"...Lest we ourselves be intruders in the Lord's sanctuaries"

This is some serious stuff. I blow it off so much of the time. I hardly examine myself...and I mean REALLY examine...getting to the heart issues, not just amending behavior, etc. Also--do we help others in their process of examining themselves? In the role of accountability? Are we challenging others as well as ourselves, lest we should allow intruders into our midst to worship in the Lord's sanctuary?

I realize this is really touchy ground. We don't like "getting into other people's business." We think it isn't our job. We think being good Christians is about speaking the truth when it is comfortable and easy...or maybe we think that we can't approach others about issues we ourselves are struggling with...and there IS truth in this...take the plank out of your own eye before removing the speck in your brother's. But remember we are called a BODY for a reason. We are many members that make up ONE community, and part of living in community together is challenging one another by speaking the truth (even HARD truth) in love, and not being afraid to do it.

There is definitely a weeding process here...but we need to be careful about WHO and HOW we weed. I'm having a hard time with this concept. I am really bad at confronting people--especially people in the Church with me. It is too close and uncomfortable and I always doubt my motives, asking, "Who am I to approach HIM on something that I myself struggle with?" Or "Who am I to approach HIM about his weakness when I am by no means strong?" And I cripple myself because I believe these lies. Instead of consulting the Lord, surrendering my pride, and asking for His mercy and guidance, I decide that I should just keep my mouth shut because, after all, I'm a sinner too and I have no right to apprach "so and so" about his. But how does this benefit the body? How does it further the mission of the Church and strengthen the community of believers. It doesn't.

Man. I don't really know where I'm going with this next. My thoughts are sort of jumbled because I'm still thinking about all of this.

I just think it's really convicting to think about the holiness of the Lord and of the Lord's place. I take it for granted and I tarnish the Holy Place. I don't think of it as my DUTY to search my heart. I don't examine myself enough...and I don't have the strength to help others in the process either. Lord, help. Thank you that your grace never ends!