Monday, July 17, 2006

"She Rides The Eye of The Hurricane..."

It is 1:05 am. I got off work at 12:15. bleh. It was a yucky night. I feel like so much went wrong. I don't know what came over em! ugh. One of those nights that leave me feeling very discouraged...and wanting to be somewhere else. I don't want to think this way. I want to claim this time and this job for the Lord. But sometimes its really hard. Some days I just don't want to be doing this. But it isn't about what I want. That's what I'm learning...and it hurts. I might want to be at a different job--but God wants me at Fry's right now. I might want to be going to school in the fall--but God wants me to wait until the spring. Sometimes I feel really lonely. It's hard to surrender my life to the Lord daily--moment by moment, really. He's really working on this heart of mine...and taking me to a place of realization--that HE is my ALL. So that no matter where I am and no matter what circumstances I find myself in, I can be at peace in Him.

I'm listening to David Wilcox (sing:eye of the hurricane). It's nice. I love this song. I don't work tomorrow. I'm glad I'm not working but I tried to pick up a shift in order to drop one later in the week when Hallie is here. It didn't work out. That's another reason why I was so discouraged after tonight. Sigh. I should probably sleep. Everything looks worse when you're tired.

I have thoughts I want to share about Church today...but I'm too tired. Perhaps I will post again tomorrow. I love you guys.


Anonymous said...

so how's the fan club at work going for yah ;)... I'm thinking a new facebook group with this one... Oh and i can definitely relate to your "sometimes I want a different job" cause that is so me.. my poor reputation and your not helping :)

Andrea said...

haha. Well, the fan club is still a fan club. They are all so nice! Anyway....we'll see.

I can understand your wanting a new job ;) for sure! Oh Jared...Just think, you're building up your character!!