Sunday, December 31, 2006

It's Official

I am addicted to the Office. I know a lot of you have been hooked for a while. Better late than never, right? I have only seen about ten episodes. However, I found a website that streams them free so....major distraction coming right up :)

Also. I am in love with the theme song. Earlier today I took a nap and woke up with this song in my head that I COULD NOT figure out...then I remembered. The Office! So I downloaded it. I'm quite excited. It will be my ringtone quite shortly :)

Happy New Year to all!!

Saturday, December 30, 2006

I found a $1200 ticket to Kenya
...a $1300 ticket to India
...a $1000 ticket to Finland
...a $1300 ticket to Australia
...a $3500 ticket to Thialand

if money wasn't an issue...where would you go?

Friday, December 29, 2006

An Adventure

You never know what might happen in Broken Bow, OK. Actually, when it did happen, I wasn't in Broken Bow I was in Idabel...just down the street from Hochatown (pronounced "HO" like "ho ho ho"...chatown, NOT "HOO"chatown, like my dad keeps saying). Sarah and I decided to "go out" tonight, so we chose the late night showing of "The Holiday," a chick flick I had heard of once (must've seen a preview somewhere) but had soon forgotten. She had already seen it and wanted to again. So we went. It's a Friday night so, naturally, we went out ;). It also happens to be a STORMY friday night...mostly just rainy. It's been raining pretty steady all day.

The movie was's about two different love stories--one taking place in LA, the other in Surrey, England. One of the stories is cute, the other trashy. So there we were, the ONLY two people in a very small theater watching this movie, when all of a sudden there was a loud pop and the screen went blank (we were about half way through the film). Then, the movie flickered back on, but soon went blank again. The lights came on, then went off. Soon, the back-up lights went on. The power was out. With the film off, we could hear the storm raging quite wildly outside. Sounded beautiful. We weren't sure what to do. It was a weird feeling and a little creepy because we were the only two people watching the movie (thank goodness it wasn't a horror or suspense!!). We got up, walked out, and soon found ourselves in a COMPLETELY pitch black corridor, trying to find our way back out to the main lobby (cell phones do make good flashlights in situations of emergency). Following other voices in the lobby, we soon found ALL the movie-goers...just a handful. We quickly decided we didn't care if the power came back on or not, this was quite an adventure and very much a thrill. I had never had that happen before! There I was, surrounded by oklahomans with THICK accents, gathered around a cold hot-dog grill and a nacho display, excited out of my mind that it was happening. I think I'm probably weird. oh well.

Sure enough, the power didn't come back on. Well, we at least didn't want to wait around forever for it to get fixed...the storm was pretty bad and it could've taken forever. So we left. We drove home in the pouring rain, excited to tell our thrilling story, and hydroplaning down the highway through hochatown and back to broken bow. Man I love these names :)

Goodnight, all! I hope you had as exciting an evening as I! ;)

it's out!!!

The DGM national conference info is out (not details, though)!! It's September 28-30-- "Stand: A Call for the Endurance of the Saints". I want to go. I think I will. I am going to check train fares...

It's raining in oklahoma

It's a cold, dreary evening here in oklahoma. I love it. It is drizzly with thunder and lightening! So beautiful. We made it here safely after close to 20 hrs in the car yesterday. yuck. Like mom says, dad is into these "endurance events." I'm not so sure about them :) However, listening to David Wilcox while driving across the plains of Texas IS quite enjoyable.

We left Arizona in a blizzard! Right up around Lordsburg, in the dark early morning, we made it into snow!! The headlights shining bright on all the snowflakes made for a beautiful experience :) I loved it.

We'll be here for at least 3 more days before we leave for Chicago. I'm feeling less nervous and more excited about getting to moody. That's encouraging. I find myself very frequently asking the Lord to walk beside me and uphold me with his righteous right hand.

love to all!

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

I love you, friends!!

I am going to miss you SO much!!

I leave tomorrow at 4am. Dad, mom and I are driving to Chicago! We're going through OK to visit some friends for 5 days, so we won't actually get to Chicago until the 3rd. I start orientation on the 4th and classes on the 8th! I can hardly believe it. I am very excited but also surprisingly nervous. Everything just seems so new...and it seems harder to leave family and friends this time. I already feel homesick, and I house-sick. I do love this house. Anyway, I trust in the Lord and am confident of the work He is doing in my life. I am excited to see Him lead and look forward to new experiences! I can't wait to be in CLASS again! wahoo! Plus, Allie will be visiting me in January (yay!), Sarah will be coming down to visit me (and the school!!), and Hannah will be coming to Chicago for a visit sometime, too. I look forward to showing you around :)

I love you all and thank you for your presence in my life, for the truth you speak to me, and the encouragement you are! you are incredible people :)

Your prayer at this time are GREATLY appreciated :)
love you, miss you!!

Hey, Peter Pan
I'm going home now
I've done all I can
Besides I'm grown now
I'll think of you all painted with the night
You sit and watch from somewhere
As one by one the lights go out

I wrote a note to tell you how you matter
When the rain came down
All the letters scattered
And washed away
Drifted off to Never
Where you'll be safe from me now forever

I believe you now when
You say that this will hurt
So I don't have to go and
Play with you in the dirt now

Hey Peter Pan
I'm going home now
I'm all grown up
You're on your own now
I'll think of you all painted with the night
You sit and watch from somewhere
As one by one the lights go out

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

I felt old today

I think its the packing up and moving away thing. That'll do it. I feel like my life is about to change...a lot. It's sort of a strange feeling. It somehow makes me feel old...

Saturday, December 23, 2006

Long lay the world in sin and error pining. Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth. A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices...

Truly He taught us to love one another, His law is love and His gospel is peace.

Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother. And in his name all oppression shall cease.

He knows our need, our weakness is no stranger, Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

His power and glory ever more proclaim!

Friday, December 22, 2006

Deeper Still

In the tears you gave to me
I found a river to an ocean
A concrete sky and a stone cold sea
That came to where the emptiness cracked open

And all my fears came crashing through
And met the fire of my sorrow
But I found my strength in forgiving you
I never even dreamed how far my heart could go

To give my life beyond each death
From this deeper well of trust
To know that when there's nothing left
You will always have what you gave to love

In this life, the love you give becomes the only lasting treasure
And what you lose will be what you win
A well that echoes down too deep to measure

A silver coin rings down that well
You could never spend too much, a diamond echoes deeper still
And you'll always have what you gave to love,
You will always have what you gave to love
(David Wilcox)

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

"I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or the does of the field, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases." Song of Solomon 2:7

"She shall pursue her lovers but not overtake them, and she shall seek them but shall not find them. Then she shall say, 'I will go and return to my first husband, for it was better for me then than now.'" Hosea 2:7

"Therefore, behold, I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak tenderly to her. And there I will give her vineyards and make the Valley of Achor a door of hope, And there she shall answer as in the days of her youth, as at the time when she came out of the land of Egypt." Hosea 2:14,15

"Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is." Ephesians 5:15-17

"For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness.Therefore, whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you." 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8

I've been very convicted about a lot of things lately...mainly, how we are called to act as believers, especially in regards to each other as male and female. Christ calls me to be holy; the Father's will is my sanctification (a PURE self). What does this mean? And because He wills it for EACH of His children, how must it change the way I live towards people?

I don't really know what to do about some of my thoughts. For now the answer is "...pray without ceasing..." that I might act in obedience, according to His will.

Lord, make me weak so I will know the strength of you, who are strong!

"Every one of us lives only to journey further and further into the mountains." Lewis

Monday, December 18, 2006

it's hard to wait

My grandpa (papa) just went in for surgery about an hour ago. He has had 3 bypass surgeries and they are all blocked up. One of his arteries is almost completely clogged and his kidneys are functioning below 50%. The doctor painted a pretty bleak picture of it all today... just being frank about the condition of papa's body. There is still fluid in his lungs... but the surgery hopes to open up one of his bypasses so his heart can pump better. The problem is, all the dye they use to monitor everything has to be cleaned out later by his kidneys. There is a lot of concern because his kidneys are now in pretty bad shape. After the doctor talked with him today he turned to my grandma and said something to the effect of "it looks like its the curtains for me".

I pray if its God's will Papa might spend more time with us... but that's sort of a selfish thing for me to wish. If it isn't His will, I pray He would take Papa right home to Him, and what a joy that would be.

I like the way mom prayed tonight, "we picture angels around the operating table waiting with bated breath, as we do, to see all that your powerful hand might accomplish".

Saturday, December 16, 2006

I *love* Caedmon's Call's Long Line of Leavers. sigh.
Starin' down the stars
Jealous of the moon
You wish you could fly
Just being where you are
There's nothin' you can do
If you're too scared to try

Friday, December 15, 2006

My Love Tank Feels Empty

Do you ever have so many thoughts flying around in your head that your emotions get really tangled up (currently: huge amounts of love and sadness and fear and worry and pain...)? That's how I feel... a little like a mess and a lot in need of grace... like the slightest thing will set me off... It's overwhelming, and very exhausting. I want to cry with my face in a pillow and get it all out. I can feel this tangle of emotion building up and I feel like I just might burst. I feel rather ridiculous because if anyone were to look at me they probably wouldn't really notice anything... but inside I just sorta feel like I'm screaming. There are a lot of changes right now in our family. I think that's the hardest thing. Growing up isn't easy when it means losing certain loved ones. I find myself crying "Why, Father?" and listening for some sort of reply. Its coming... but in bits and pieces. I ask for the strength and the courage to be patient, meanwhile redeeming the time. I need to cast all my cares on the Lord. Please, pray for strength.

And I feel a constant need to be hugged.

All this thinking and hurting has led me to Isaiah 41:9, 10.

I know this post is crazy confusing. I'm sorry. There's a lot to explain but I'm just really tired right now.

My Papa is in the hospital and not doing well. He is one of the most amazing people I know. I have deleted so many lines of type because I can't seem to say the right words... I love him. I think that's enough for now. I love my Papa. He is my "Numero Uno."

"And I thank the Lord for the people I have found,
I thank the Lord for the people I have found."

All I Want for My Birthday


Thursday, December 14, 2006

Turning 20 Feels Weird

I don't know why... and that's all I got.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

From Philadelphia to Mexico

I got home Monday night at 11:45. On Tuesday morning at 6:00, mom and I left for Mexico to get Dad. If you recall, he had surgery for a hernia while in mexico. He is still SO sore so he couldn't drive out of Mexico... he can't even push the gas or break pedals b/c it sends shooting pains all through his body. Another missionary family that was down there offered to caravan with him out of the village and to the border. The husband drove dad's truck with all the furniture while dad rested. He said the bumpy road leaving the village was a killer. i can only imagine...oh man. So mom and I drove across the border to a small hotel where dad stayed the night. The other missionary family had to be somewhere else and the border closed on monday before dad could cross. Mom and I drove across the border to pick him up--so mom could drive his truck back for him while he rested. He told us to meet him in a brightly colored hotel on the other side of Augua Prieta (the border town). The hotel was SO bright. Definitely a mexican hotel. We drove in and didn't know what room dad was in but eventually saw him standing at a window waving. He hobbled out of his room to meet us, his pants held up only by a loosely clasped belt (he can't zip up his pants or button them because it pulls on the stitches and hurts really bad). He was quite the sight. Pictures don't do the story justice because all the funny stuff was in his movements and actions... and words ("today is a milestone, anne! I pooped!"'s reply was: "I knew it would be something stupid like that." I just laughed. hard.).

We all made it safely across the border. When i was leaving (i was driving the van), the border patrol wanted to know what my business in Mexico was. Don't worry, I didn't give them the whole story...If they only knew. Dad told mom the entire story of his surgery IN DETAIL on the way back. After we stopped in Sierra Vista for lunch, dad wanted to ride with me so he could tell ME the whole story. He thinks of it as a war survival story, I think. Crazy guy. He had it done in the village. First he had a spinal tap (gross) that paralyzed his entire bottom half. Everything was conducted in Spanish. Dad said the doctor was very compassionate (or else, as Jay said, he just knew that the gringo's are wimpy and can't handle pain).

He wobbles and hobbles around the house calling "Anne" and awful lot. Haha. Just a little bit ago he was sitting in the chair next to me trying to get his pants and socks on. He finally had to have me help with the socks. The funniest thing is that he CAN'T laugh. It hurts him really bad. So he gets really mad when anyone says anything funny. He YELLS "Stop talking before I laugh!" Apparently last night he tried to convince my mom to let him have a pee can by his bed so he didn't have to walk to the bathroom. She said no way... "Once you let an old man start peeing in a cup, everything starts going down hill." Haha. She handles him very well. I know he is in a lot of pain...sometimes its really sad b/c I can see it in his face, and he can't breathe very well. He takes morphine only sometimes... and always acts like it is really screwing with his mind, exclaiming "I see the white knights riding backwards and the red queen doesn't have a head!" He is SO weird.

He has a bandage over the spot so we can't see the damage... eventually, I suppose. I got a picture of the bandage :)

I love dad. He's amazing. I can't believe he just had surgery in the village to avoid the hassle of American hospitals. So cool. haha. Anyway... he can't lift anything over 20 lbs for 2 months. That'll be hard for him. He's already trying to break the rules and mom yells at him. He could potentially undo everything that was fixed and stitched back up. hopefully not.

Tonight we're getting our tree! So exciting!

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Sing to Jesus

Come and see, look on this mystery
The Lord of the Universe, nailed to a tree
Christ our God, spilling His Holy blood
Bowing in anguish, His sacred head

Sing to Jesus, Lord of our shame
Lord of our sinful hearts.
He is our great Redeemer.
Sing to Jesus, Honor His name.
Sing of His faithfulness, pouring His life out unto death

Come you weary and He will give you rest
Come you who mourn, lay on His breast
Christ who died, risen in Paradise
Giver of mercy, Giver of Life

Sing to Jesus His is the throne
Now and forever,
He is the King of Heaven.
Sing to Jesus, we are His own.
Now and forever sing for the love our God has shown.

Sing to Jesus, Lord of our shame
Lord of our sinful hearts.
He is our great Redeemer.
Sing to Jesus, Honor His name.

Sing to Jesus His is the throne
Now and forever,
He is the King of Heaven.
Sing to Jesus, we are His own.
Now and forever sing for the love our God has shown.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Drink Tea

I recommend Tazo. My favorite is Refresh. Next are Calm and really should try them. The nice thing about hanging around a cold apartment is that drinking tea becomes much more fun...bundling up in a sweatshirt and quilt with a mug full of steaming tea is just so wonderful.

Last night I stayed at the apartment while Jay and Kristen went to small group. I sat on their couch with candles lit and the Christmas tree lights twinkling. It was so cozy. I eventually decided to curl up and watch In America. I had never seen it before... it was really good. It has made my favorites list :)

We made Christmas cookies yesterday. YUM. I will post pictures later. It was lots of fun... they were the cut-out sugar cookies. They're my Christmas favorite. I told mom we have to make some more when I get home.

So...funny story. Not really funny but sort of. If you know my dad then it's funny. Apparently he has had this funny lump on his stomach for a while. He decided to tell my mom two days before he left for Mexico that he thinks its a hernia. He's all casual about it, but won't let mom see the lump (lest she "freak out," I suppose). He told my mom that he wanted the surgery done in the village, so he was going to have the Indian doctor check it out. Sure enough, he's got a hernia. He is scheduled for surgery tomorrow at one, and expects to drive out of mexico (bumpy roads and all) on Monday, caravan style with another missionary family. He's crazy. The funny part is, the price is no different. Insurance covers it, but he doesn't want to have to deal with the hassel of American hospitals, etc. He would rather have it done in rural Mexico. I think it's amazing. He wrote me this really funny email a couple days ago about how this puts a hold on our Grand Canyon backpacking trip. He said "I'm getting my gut sliced open and then stitched back up." It's probably a good thing that the trip is off...although, knowing my dad, he might still try it. Don't worry, I'm putting my foot down (mom already has). No way am I dragging my dad out of the Grand Canyon because his stitched came undone. Yuck.

I love my dad. I love that he had the bump but just didn't tell anyone till now. Oh. He also thinks he knows when he got it....or what might have irritated it. A couple months ago, while at the shop working, he was cutting some boards and a piece flew off and jabbed him in the stomach really hard. He just told mom about that, too. I love how he tells her NOW. So crazy. Anyway, that's my crazy dad story. So, the day after I get home (tuesday morning) my mom and I will probably be driving down to the border crossing to pick him up (he'll spend the night in a motel b/c the border will close before he can get there on monday). But he wants help crossing the border in case they give him trouble or try to have him unload all his furniture. I don't know how he thinks he'll travel so soon after the surgery. His sister (my aunt) had this done a year ago and apparently was flat on her back for close to a week... and had a hard time of it once she had to go back to work (REALLY sore). Hopefully it will heal fast and he can get back to normal... and hopefully he doesn't push it and overdo it. Oh dad. I love him.

(and don't worry, really. The surgeon is supposed to be really good. One of the best down there :))

I think I'll get going. I need to study more CLEP. OH! good news! More of my credits transferred than I thought. Moody is accepting my English AND my latin (on top of the other stuff). Woohoo! After I CLEP sociology, I won't have that many pre-reqs. The ones I will have will be fun--all the theology requirements that I want to take anyway. I'm so excited about this. Thank you, God, for providing. Thank you all for praying. I'll try to get a letter out soon. Bye!

Monday, December 04, 2006

Excellent Sermon

I am here to recommend Piper's sermon "The Supremacy of God in the Life of the Mind." It is online for purchase ( or you can follow this address to get the article version and read it. Please do!

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Jay and Kristen's apartment is SO beautiful. And with all the Christmas decorations, its even more so. Yesterday we went out to a Christmas Tree farm with their friends Todd and Jen (and 2 yr. old Michaela). It was SO FUN. We rode out to the farms on this horse drawn (or tractor drawn...depending) wagon. They gave us a saw, and we just wondered through all these trees looking for the right one. I wanted to take home all of them...especially the Charlie Brown-ish looking ones. Afterwards, we got free hot chocolate and apple cider. It was amazing. We decorated the tree back at the apartment and it looks beautiful. Here are a couple pictures...

Chris and Kate are coming over for dinner tonight. I am very excited to see them. On Tuesday Kristen and I are running errands (IKEA!) and walking through Chestnut Hill, a really neat spot nearby with so many really beautiful, quaint shops. We're also going to make Christmas cookies!!! And sometime soon we're going to watch elf. I've never seen it...but I want to. Last night we were going to watch it but decided not to. Alen and Heather came over and we chatted and played a couplse rounds of Whonoo. It was fun.
Alright. I need to go. Have a marvelous day, all!

Friday, December 01, 2006

"Son of God, Purger of the inner parts, Discerner of my sittings down, my risings, wilt Thou hallow this soul of mine?"

-Jim Elliot (Shadow of the Almighty)

I'm sitting on the couch in Jay and Kristen't apartment looking out the window at a grey, drizzly afternoon. It isn't cold--probably about 70--its just dreary. It's quite beautiful. I might not like days and days of this in a row but because I don't see much of this in AZ, it's most enjoyable. This morning after Jay went to work, Kristen and I just lounged around the house in our PJ's. Their friends Allen and Heather are pregnant and found out this morning that they are having a little GIRL! This sparked baby conversation between the sisters for quite some time :) I'm really excited to be an aunt.

This afternoon Kristen, Heather and I are going to Target and Ikea. I'm super excited. I've only been to Ikea once but love it.

I've been having lots of new thoughts about what to do this summer. There are lots of possibilities and I am thinking about something really crazy and really exciting. I can't wait. I will post about it soon. But I need to think some more about it and pray about it. I would appreciate prayers of yours, also, even though you won't be able to pray specifically yet. I'll keep you posted :)

Tomorrow night we are going to cut down the Christmas tree! Woohoo. And we're going to watch Charlie Brown Christmas AND White Christmas! So amazing. Also, on Monday night Chris and Kate Walker are coming over for dinner.

It's fun to be here! It's crazy that I'm staying with my sister who is MARRIED. I love their cozy little home. I want one of my own. someday...

Talk to you later! oh. Philadelphia is beautiful. I LOVE it. It makes me really excited about livine in Chicago. REALLY excited. It's the big city feel. It's new to me. Tucson is big but not like this. And we live far enough out that I don't feel so much a part of it. I'm anxious to see what Chicago is like. Eeek!