A little bit of an update...

I haven't felt this way in a while. Yesterday was hard. Really hard. I needed to get off campus so badly--away from everyone...everything. So I decided to go to the Chicago Public Library for the first time. I found my new favorite spot. The place is 10 floors. The ninth floor is the "Winter Garden"--a room of windows and skylights with trees growing inside and tables and chairs. I sat for two hours, wrote seven pages in my journal, and read 1, 2 Peter and 1, 2, 3 John. I was thinking a lot about love. 1 Corinthians 13:7 kept coming into my mind. What does it mean that love believes all things? What about hopes all things? And, perhaps harder still, never gives up?

I've been asking God for months to "please, teach me to love people well!" And now, when He is taking me through that process of growth and purification, I freak out and wonder what on earth He's doing. "Why is this so hard and why do I feel overwhelmed...I just want to learn to love. I want the faith that's needed." And His reply is surely "I am teaching you love, you've just closed your eyes."
Please help my unbelief, Lord, and forgive my forgetful heart. I'm learning what a broken lover I am...and how grace swallows my life. Loving people is not efficient--Derek Webb is right. I have found rest in the truth that God takes my cracked, weak, broken love offering and by grace makes it pure and whole. It's a beautiful picture if you think about it. Dare to imagine what it LOOKS like.


I've been asking God to teach me the scandalous work of the Holy Spirit in my life. He's taught me so much about the Holy Spirit already this semester but I pray that He would take me deeper still. Would you encourage me, Spirit? Lead me? Please--guide me in humble obedience...

Obedience. What a word. Obey Me and I get glory. Obey me and you are satisfied. Incredible, isn't He? I am overwhelmed by His deep, deep love. I fall to my knees...He is so faithful.

I pray Ephesians 3:14-19 for you, friends!

Exciting things are happening in my life. Really exciting things. Please pray that in the midst of it all, Christ would be my single passion. Pray for discernment and for an eager and willing heart to do His kingdom work. Please pray for motivation and death to cynicism. Please pray He would continue to prepare my life for Africa...just over a month away! I can't believe it.

Wake up! LIVE.